That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
