what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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