Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
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