she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
