just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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