And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I just googled if crying burns calories
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
