True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
