I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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