Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
