Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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