Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
