Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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