I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
