The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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