You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
