I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
