4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
