He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize
