they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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