No subtext here. People are naked.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
