The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
