I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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