I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
They have beer where we have blood.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
