Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
