windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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