so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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