Taylor Swift is so right about you.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize