so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
