Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
