You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I love you. Go after that dick
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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