Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
