How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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