don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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