Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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