You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
