ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
