My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I deserve this hangover.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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