omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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