wakey wakey hands off snakey
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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