The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
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