She's JV to your varsity
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize