Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
and she was petting her beer can
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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