In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize