i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize