JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
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