O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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