ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize