i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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