Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
my vag is so smooth its legendary
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
