I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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