i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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